It feels weird to initiate this blog with a post about loss of love, but that's what's on my mind right now, so here you go.
Tonight marks the end of a month and a half relationship that I had with a man we'll call "Mr. X."
Now, I know a month and a half is a blip on the radar of most relationships, and I'm not even going to try to deny that. However, big or small, I think every relationship manages to have a large impact on the people involved, if the right chemistry is involved. And believe me, Mr. X and I had the right chemistry.
Mr. X and I met online, which probably just adds to the downplay of this seemingly less tragic situation, but you can't knock what you haven't tried. Mr. X is, in my opinion, the model for the "perfect man." He's sweet, caring, and more than willing to make his partner happy (so you Florida bloggers better keep an eye out). He was one of the easiest people to talk to; long winded when I wanted to just listen, but silent when I just wanted to talk. Our relationship, however, has experienced a vast difference in goal-orientation. Probably the only downfall to Mr. X and I is that we have a six-year age difference, me being the younger one (and still in college). Mr. X is graduating beauty school in January, and has been offered, and taken, a job in Panama City Beach, Florida.
Now, some people may be thinking, If Mr. X is such a 'perfect man,' why let distance get in the way? To those people, I would say this: I am only a junior in college. I have grad school to think about, and a career that is likely to take me across the country; Mr. X wants to open his own salon, a business that ties the owner to their clientele, and their city. At this point in both of our lives, and especially his career, I think it's unfair for us to expect that either I to travel to him on school breaks, or for him to wait for me to finish my education settle down. I don't plan on settling down right after grad school, or even after my first job, and that would be completely unfair to a man whose bound to his city just as much as his career. Although I would confidently say that Mr. X and I had the potential to make it long-term, I don't think the circumstances were quite right.
For those who may be thinking, He's not moving 'till January; it's only June, I simply say that I don't want to be in a relationship with an expiration date. We had a really solid, really wonderful two months (including getting-to-know-you dates), and I don't want those to be marred by half a year of knowing our relationship would come to an end in January. I still plan on keeping in contact with Mr. X, I still plan on being his friend, and I still love him. I might not love him in the "let's get married and have kids" kind of way anymore, but that's not the only kind of love there is.